Finally, after what seems a VERY long time – and almost near the end of the Harry Potter book on ipod – I arrive in Vancouver. I’m staying with old friends of my mother’s, but I don’t really have enough time to stop. I get to the club about a half hour before doors open and pile in. My ears still haven’t popped at all and I have a bad case of airplane ears.

Inside is a totally cool venue – I’m playing at the Beaumont Studios in their theatre. The building is an artist co-op – upstairs are studios and the entire place is a gallery. The theatre puts on small productions, but is dark on Mondays, so they decided to set up a music night there called “Vancouver City Limits”, run by Bruce, who also owns a recording studio above. Bruce and his cohorts film the nights, edit them, and then broadcast them on their own youtube channel (Check it out by searching for “Vancouver City Limits” on youtube - I’ll let you all know when the show is up). I’ll be playing second, after a woman named Trinity, and before a band called La La Boom Boom.

I do a quick soundcheck, but my ears still havent’t popped from the mountains and I feel like I’m hearing myself out in the lobby or in another building. I think I’m in tune with myself, but feel kind of underwater.

When the crowd arrives, I run into Adam, a friend who plays with the Gruff, and who also happens to be hosting a house concert for me in Victoria on Friday. Crazy! He’s come to see his girlfriend who plays fiddle in La La Boom Boom.

Trinity does a sweet set of music, playing guitar, kick and high hat all at once – she confides before her set that she was a bit nervous because her parents were seeing her play for the first time that night – something which I just went through in Medicine Hat.

There’s a quick break and then I go on. I’m exhausted and totally out of it – I sound like I have gauze in my ears or like someone else is singing. But whoever’s singing, it sounds alright and mostly on key. I play a buncha goofy songs – made for youtubing – and everyone laughs along to most. Afterwards, La La Boom Boom put on an amazing show – they remind me of Crash Test Dummies meets Arcade Fire, although I’m not sure I’m totally up on Arcade Fire enough to make that comparison. Anyway – it’s great stuff – Adam’s girlfriend is a great fiddler (so is Adam) and the band has great energy.

After the show I sell a CD or two and then head over to Celeste and Jack’s – my mom’s friends. They’re a very nice couple with two lovely pups – old friends of both my moms from Ottawa. I park outside and they welcome me at the door. We talk about my folks for a bit, watch a little news, and then I head to bed.

The next morning, I pack up – give Jack a hand getting a TV out to the garage, and then head down to my car….

OH #%@#^@#$%^

My car has been broken into – the lock to the driver door is dangling and the handle’s snapped in half. I drop my stuff and open the car… the glove compartment has been rifled through – so has the change holder… which still holds a $5 bill and a buncha change… strange… I scan the car and try to figure out what’s missing. In the back my guitar is still sitting there, thank god, as is the suitcase filled with most of my CDs and in the trunk is the rest of my stuff.

It looks like they only stole a backpack - filled with 30 David Hein CDs, some cards that I don’t use much (health card for Ontario, insurance, and one credit card with new pin chip thing…), and some papers and a book on musical theatre that a friend lent me (I’m buying you a new one, Grant – sorry!!!). Whoever stole it must have been looking for my GPS – and they certainly got an interesting collection of what must seem like crap to them… I mean, unless they’re really into indie folksy music or musical theatre… I cancel the credit card, make a police report, phone my insurance, and then Enterprise Rent a Car.

I drive to car to where the gig was last night hoping that I might have just left the bag there, but I haven’t. Because the lock is trashed in the car, I have to hold it with my left hand while driving with my left. To make matters worse, my GPS, now thoroughly angry at me after our mountain trip, sends me to 2 wrong addresses. Finally, I get sent to a Suzuki dealer to fix the lock, but he tells me it won’t be ready for 4-5 days – 1 or 2 after I was planning on leaving. He also tells me that he can’t believe that Enterprise gave me this car for driving through the mountains, since the tires are almost bald… no wonder I was slightly terrified yesterday.

The service guy manages to get the handle popped back in, so I don’t have to hold it while driving, but tells me that it won’t lock. I climb in and push on it gently – the door holds – then I check the lock, which goes down and seems to lock the door. I pull it up again and then try the the door handle… which doesn’t open. I’ve locked myself in and now have to climb through the passenger side to exit. This day is just getting better and better.

Finally, I end up at an Enterprise on the edge of town and after a fair bit of “discussion” with the Calgary Enterprise people, they agree that I can swap out for a new BC car – a blue version of the little red Swift.

I swap out all my stuff and head over to my friend, Ray’s, where I’m staying for 2 blissful days off.

Honestly, I’m a bit confused about the whole thing. Staying with Celeste and Jack, we talked about some of a people Jack works with – homeless, drug addicts and poor people. So even though I spent the entire #$%#$^ day dealing with Enterprise and insurance and whatnot, I still feel kinda sorry for them – especially thinking about them rifling through the bag and only finding CDs that they probably can’t sell and a book on musical theatre. And I certainly came off pretty lucky out of it – Enterprise is covering most of the costs and my insurance will pay for everything… but I still kind of feel like it’s personal somehow – like my generally naïve, happy-go-lucky demeanor got taken advantage of - and I know I shouldn’t feel this way too, but since EVERYONE in Vancouver seems totally UNSURPRISED that I got broken into, I’m kind of holding it against the entire city.

Ray and I talk music for hours and then hit the hay. Today I stayed inside. Most cities I’m excited to check out, but today I just want to stay in, with all of my stuff that I’ve moved in from the car.

I get up early and prepare myself for a LOT of driving. But the prairies are beautiful early in the morning – kind of underwater fields of blue. Plus I’ve just finished two Harry Potter books on tape and, although I kind of hate J.K. Rowling at this point, I have begun the 6th book.

I get into Medicine Hat early enough to get a couple Christmas presents for my folks – I drop them off and grab lunch with my Dad. It’s been great to get to duck back and see him so much.

But I have to keep going – Vancouver is very far away. Harry Potter going strong, I cruise through Calgary and head towards the mountains. I’ve chosen HWY 1 over 3, which is apparently more twisty-turny… but once I hit the mountains, I wonder how it could be. Suffice to say the beauty of these peaks is dwarfed by my fear of driving off them – especially once night falls and giant trucks start barreling all around me. No fun.

I pull into a town called Golden sometime around 7 that night. My muscles have totally cramped up and I’m getting tired. In front of me is a sign saying that the road ahead has serious visibility issues and poor road conditions. The guy at the gas station says that all the cars coming back from that route have been coated in mud and their headlight barely shone. I decide to stay the night here and brave an 8-hour trip tomorrow in the daylight – all before playing a show. Who booked this stupid tour??

The hotel is nice enough, but the internet isn’t working, so I use their strangely smelling whirlpool and sauna and try to uncramp my driving muscles.

The next morning, I’m up early and the daylight feels more hospitable to driving – but soon flurries are falling and, although I thought I was out of the worst of it in Vernon, my GPS tries to kill me by taking me the long way round. Up and down and round and round – my ears popping at least 20 times and my tires skidding underneath me – the only good thing about this road is that there doesn’t seem to be any giant trucks – they clearly have better relationships with their GPS units.

[In which I’m thwarted by Santa Claus, hide out with Al Capone, and write a song about Beer, Lemons, and Herpes]

I’m just trying to fill my car up (hooray for low gas prices!) but my GPS refuses to get me to a street that isn’t blocked off. Every turn is blocked off by police and I start to wonder if coming to Moose Jaw was that wise. Moose Jaw is well known for one thing: a honeycomb of tunnels underneath that we’re lived in by the Chinese working population AND by Mr. Al Capone. Yes – this is a city of criminals and secret activities – and now all the streets are barricaded off. Greeeeat.

Turns out though that it’s the Brandon Santa Clause Parade. I eventually get to a gas station and then back to Bobby’s Place, where I’m playing. Bobby’s Place is one of my favourites – the last time I played was a Monday, so I’m looking forward to a Saturday – and I’m not disappointed – the place is packed. I set up and then head over to the hotel where I’ve got a room – at "Capone’s Hideaway" Motel. It’s not exactly a 5 star, but it’s a room and it’s much nicer than hiding out in a tunnel.

Bobby’s place is one of my favourites because I always get a place to stay, a nice crowd and a good meal with vegetables – for some reason, I always want vegetables here and they always make a mean salad.

I meet a nice guy who asks “are you related to Ted Hein?” “Yeah – he’s my dad.” Turns out he knows my Dad from a long time ago and lost track of him when he lived in Grand Prairie. Apparently my North of Nowhere poster cinched the deal since, according to him, nowhere is more like “North of Nowhere” than Grand Prairie.

Again, it’s a combo of a show for some and background music for others, but I have a pretty fun time. I make up a song for every set and the first suggestion is to write a song about “Beer, Lemons, and Herpes” – which is called, appropriately “Beer, Lemons and Herpes” – surely destined for my next album.

After a long time, we wrap up and I run back to Capone’s Hideaway. I need some sleep since tomorrow I have to drive like 82 hours towards Vancouver, where I’m playing in 2 days…

I’ve now played in Brandon more than almost any other town in my travels across Canada – after two folk fests and a stop or two, it’s nice to have friends who are looking forward to me arriving.

I’m playing at the Lady of the Lake – which I always assumed to be a coffee shop of some sort, but instead turns out to be a gigantic very cool antique shop – with a restaurant and stage tacked onto the end. Everywhere you look it’s stunningly decorated – in one corner, pink Christmas trees are matched with pink bears and chairs and bears, oh my, while in another there’s a black and white movie motif. The place is massive.

The restaurant itself is also huge, with ridiculously high ceilings and tons of tables – which are apparently all sold out – less due to me (I think I sold out 2 tables…) than a couple Christmas parties and fans of the band playing after me, a blues act called The Majestics. I’m only playing from 6-8, but am looking forward to my dinnertime show – especially to a packed house and a couple tables of friends.

While The Majestics sound check, I wander around the store looking at Christmas stuff – wishing, even though I like being in Brandon, that I was back home planning Christmas trees and putting up stockings for the cats.

Before I play, I hang out with some friends from the Brandon Folk Fest. Apparently the folk fest is in the midst of political craziness – some of my friends who’ve worked on the fest for years, have quit in protest over it being taken over by a local politician. It’s a long story and I only get to talk for ten minutes. One friend refuses to talk about it until he’s been drinking. It sound pretty awful all around.

The show is great – despite the tawky gigantic auto parts maker Christmas Party next to me. The Majestics in the front row make a nice audience, some ladies in the corner do a bit of seated dancing, my fest friends sing along, and even a couple auto part girls seem to be enjoying it. One asks me if I’m married and when I tell her yes, she tells me I’ve just ruined her whole evening.

It’s a bizarre mix of being background music and actually putting on a show – but I have fun and it seems to work alright. And playing to a packed house is always nice – even if they’re only there for the other band or the food… I make up a couple tunes

My favourite moment is that at the back of the room, a couple do some whistling. Later, I go over to introduce myself – and it turns out they’re folk fest attendees and fans of my song, Jetpack. In fact, there’s a Christmas tree behind them, with cards that you can write your Christmas wish onto as ornaments. They’ve written “I want a David Hein style Jetpack”… coincidentally my Christmas wish as well. Thanks, Guys!

After the show, we head back to Lyle & Brenda’s for a jam & wine-drinking session with a variety of hard rockers and folksy types. I’m somewhat more into the wine-drinking, but I’m happy to strum away in the background, especially after playing for two hours earlier. Lyle is particularly soused and makes out with a harmonica seductively. Dave plays accordion over classic rock tunes and does a bit of pole dancing. Paul, who plays classical acoustic, shows off his electric skills.

In the middle of a long tour, it’s pretty great to come back to a place where I’ve played a fair bit and have a bunch of great, drunk friends.

I spend a bit of time with my Dad the next morning and then head out towards Regina. The prairies are still pretty to me and Saskatchewan feels a little different from Alberta – a bit flatter with even more sky and golden fields.

I’m on my 2nd Harry Potter books on tape (er… ipod) and it gets me all the way to Regina – capital of Saskatchewan and birthplace of DAVID HEIN.

I know there are lots of parts of Regina that I recognize, but however my little GPS gets me to the restaurant where I’m playing is not one of them – although I do always appreciate seeing brand names that you only see in the prairies (Safeway, Taco Time…).

I’m playing at the Cathedral Freehouse – a nice little bar/restaurant – and I’m staying just around the corner from it with Jill Straker, sister of Jeff Straker – one of the 3 Guys From The Prairies group that I play with and a very cool singer/songwriter (go check him out now at www.jeffstraker.com). Jill is also very cool and has let me drop stuff off at her place before hand. She and Jeff have just bought the place together and Jill has just moved in – but despite boxes, it’s a lovely place. Jeff texts me to tell me how strange it is that I’m sleeping in his house before him. There was some debate about whether Jill’s couch would fit me, but it looks pretty good.

The show isn’t quite as lovely. The music section of the bar is completely empty even though the other section is relatively full. I don’t know whether people come in and decide that they want to talk or what, but no one comes to listen, except for Harry the waiter and Jill, who shows up halfway through. Jill sits patiently laughing at my jokes and even sings along (she also performs with Jeff and has a nice set of pipes). She asks me to do a couple Jeff Straker covers, which I totally am unable to do (Jeff, I only know the words and chords to your choruses!). It’s not much of a show for her, unfortunately – I feel a bit silly playing either to the entire other side of the restaurant or just to Jill. After two sets, Harry nicely lets me take off. When it’s a solo show and the audience can’t outnumber the performer, it’s a bit ridiculous.

I head back to Jill’s and have an excellent sleep on her couch, which fortunately fits me fine.

Cochrane is farther than I think from Medicine Hat and my GPS, which is normally oh so reliable tells me to turn left off of a bridge. “Recalculating… recalculating…”

But I eventually make it.

Jo-Anne is an artist and you can tell that immediately when you walk into her home. First of all, she just left the door hanging open and went back to making dinner – so I walked in and was greeted by several statues, paintings, and pieces of art in the main lobby. Eventually I found Jo-Anne and she told me that her late husband was also and artist – and you can tell – 2 artists make a lot of art and her house is a testament to their productivity. Her daughter Mary is also an artist – an aspiring horror filmmaker.

After a lovely fish dinner, during which Mary tells me her favourite horror films (Nightmare on Elm Street – old school!), I set up in an art filled living room. Soon enough people arrive and we all mingle. It’s a nice group that seems somewhat linked by a home schooling network (Mary and some of the other teenagers that arrive are all home schooled).

Another old friend, Sally, who lives 15 minutes away, also joins us. We knew each other back when I worked as a set and lighting designer and she was a stage manager and we’re now in completely different lines of work, not seeing each other in years.

Although we have easily over 20 people, the show is oddly quiet – to me at least. To this point, I’ve prided myself on perfecting some of my song introductions with jokes that always seem to get a laugh – but tonight, many of them don’t smile, so I’m not sure how well I’m connecting with them. But at intermission, I talk to enough of them that I feel like it’s going well enough.

One nice guy gives me the secret origin of the word “Wiccan” (from My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish Wiccan Wedding). Apparently it’s derived from a plant that when applied to certain sensitive body parts would make you feel like you were flying. These would be occasionally applied to broomsticks, which people would ride – hence witches “flying” on broomsticks. Innnnteresting.

The second set feels a bit better. In the front is a nice family with two kids – the youngest boy looks like he wants to fall asleep, curled up with his mom – but he’s a trooper and stays awake till the end – and when presented with 3 options for an encore he chooses all of them. We make up a song called “Falling Star” about the latest meteorite crash in Saskatchewan and then I play a new tune called “Hold on Maria” – which one guy tells me was his favourite of the night.

I sell a number of CDs, but have to run – I’m playing in Regina the next day and it’s enough of a drive that I’m crashing at my Dad’s again. I say goodbye to Jo-Anne, Mary, and the statues and then hit the road.

My GPS takes me the wrong way – I don’t care what it says – driving on a dirt road for an hour is the WRONG way. But like Cochrane, I eventually get there, load in the bare minimum and quietly crash.

… but before I take off into Saskatchewan away from the Home Routes concert series…

SPECIAL THANKS to all of my amazing hosts, to Tim, Mitch & Ava at Home Routes, who set up this house concert tour – and to everyone who came out to the shows. Whether you’d been to many before or it was your first time, please keep coming out to them and tell others – they’re pretty magical little shows and I’m looking forward to playing more of them in the future. If you’re interested in hosting a show like the ones that you read about here, check out www.homeroutes.ca.

I get into Calgary around 5 and arrive at Glenn & Jane’s place. They’re somewhat new to house concerts and we play around with the living room arrangement – they’re expecting 40 people –the biggest crowd yet. They’re also Castle Mountain people and have heard good things from their friends. House concert people and ski people are good people – and Glenn and Jane prove the same.

They also have two lovely goldens – Maddy and Lucy –both are big sucks and require a fair bit of petting and hugging.

An old friend, Alex, comes to this show – and we actually get 40 people – FANTASTIC! I sit by the fireplace and go through my set – I’ve now changed the Montreal verse of “Victoria” to:

They say Montreal will burn you
She’ll say “Laissez-faire”
But her little Alouetters
Couldn’t beat the Stampeders

Bored with Calgary verses, I also add a house specific verse:

I’ve been out here a couple weeks
I’ve been enjoying these plains
But I haven’t had quite as much fun
As I’ve had at Glenn & Jane’s

The crowd is excellent – good singing along and a momentum to the laughter that you only get with 40 people. I have some great conversations with everyone afterwards.

You can tell it’s a good party when someone steals someone else’s pair of shoes… fortunately mine are safe.

I head up to bed and spend some time on the internet. I’m sadly behind on my blogging. It takes time, people! Tomorrow night is Cochrane and the last stop on the Home Routes house concert tour. And while I’m looking forward to the rest of the tour, part of me is wishing I was heading back home.

All this tour, I’ve been watching the mountains waaaaaay in the background – barely there silhouettes and often invisible – but now I’m driving towards them… and they’re getting bigger.

They resolve into waves of blue misty watercolour cutout mountains – beautiful... I get distracted by the giant wind farms out here – I was told there’d be a lot of them but… THIS is a LOT of them! Holy! They’re everywhere and seemingly random groupings. I stick my camera out the window and try to get pictures while not dropping my camera and not driving into oncoming traffic.

And suddenly, while I was looking at giant fans, the mountain silhouettes turn into actual mountains with trees and snow and avalanche signs. They’re stunning – particularly after over a week of prairies.

I make a couple phone calls at Beaver Mines, the last spot for cell signal (Gerry, my host, says “watch out for moose” and then head into the wilderness of Castle Valley. Cruising along a gravel road, I kick up a ton of dust behind me. After about fifteen minutes, I spot a truck coming my way, kicking up even more dust behind it. We cross and for a second I’m lost in a sandstorm – I brake, slowing down – and thank god – a second later a deer dashes right in front of me across the road.

I drive much slower into the Castle Mountain ski resort and am welcomed by Gerry, who’s driven down to meet me on his quad with his 2 golden retrievers, Zella and Zuzu. Zuzu has brought a stuffed bear with her. We drive up the hill a bit to Gerry & Lynn’s place –a beautiful ski resort lodgy place with excellent warpy wood banisters (I find out later that Gerry builds these).

Gerry & Lynn are boisterous, friendly folks – they live up here with their pups year round and they’ve been doing house concerts for years now. Good people. We eat dinner and they tell me a bit about Castle Mountain – apparently one of the best skiing areas around (hey Ferney folks – these Castle Mountain people are dissing your black diamonds). Gerry is also a cancer survivor and Lynn controls her arthritis – both pretty amazingly tough, they’re unfortunately moving out of the resort soon, selling their beautiful place. Gerry explains that after a while you just need a change...

Zella, who likes getting her belly rubbed, is apparently the matriarch of the mountain – the alpha dog of, not only all the dogs in the resort, but also the bears, cougars, coyotes, etc. She’s an 11 year old dog, but still runs around like crazy – she’ll round up a pack to bark off a bear, or fight a cougar herself. Zuzu on the other hand is only 2, still carries her bear around, and is still learning how to fight cougars… they both like dog treats and getting their bellies rubbed.

I’ve heard all along that the Castle Mountain shows are a bit of a party and this one proves no different. Even though it’s a Monday night we get a pretty good crowd – and a quite eclectic one. There’s an older crowd who seems to want a nice night of music, a younger crowd, made up of local working crews, who seem to want a big party, and Gerry’s practically a crowd in himself – he likes to shout out jokes and banter with me – he’s hilarious. It occasionally feels like I’m playing three shows, one for each crowd. But surprisingly everyone enjoys themselves. By the end, Dear Aunty Emm somehow devolves into an improv song called “I hate farms” – dedicated to another Jerry, who owns one of the biggest potato farms in North America – nearby in Lethbridge. He’s apparently responsible for McCain’s French fries.

The young crowd is part of a local “Fire Safe” crew – they’re contracted to fly around in helicopters to forest areas where the trees are overgrown and to remove the brush below the trees, the dead trees, and basically anything overly flammable – they hack their way through these areas and then burn their piles up – working about 12 hours a day, it sounds like hard work, but pretty rewarding – especially since they may be responsible for stopping some of the major forest firest out here.

Outside there are 10 million stars in the sky. Gerry tells me that this is nothing – up on the hill you see even more.

After the show, I hang out with Gerry & Lynn, who tell me countless Zella stories, bear stories, wolf stories, coyote stories – basically letting me know how close I am to dying out here – and then wish me a good night.

The next morning, Gerry takes me out on the quad, with the dogs running ahead – we driving around and I learn about packrat tracks (apparently packrats are real – they like to collect shiny object like pop can tabs, and they also smell horrific), snowflake rocks (dark stones flecked with white volcanic rocks), as well as valley politics, poachers, mountain men, and a million other things. At one point, Gerry says, “well, we’ve gone up about 800 feet, we should turn around to get you off in time.” 800 FEET? Apparently all the roads just slowly wind up the mountain and we’ve been going up the entire time. We stop by some creeks and the dogs go swimming in the sub-zero water, crashing through the ice happily.

We get back and I pack up – heading back into Calgary, I can’t think of a bigger difference from this land of stars, bears, and mountains.

Okay, I’m sucking up a bit to my Calgary audiences, but still… I watched the game with my Dad in Medicine Hat and was more than usually excited when they won.

Here also are my dad's two cats - one weighing slightly more than the other.

Frank and Debby are a great folksy couple in Coaldale with a couple horses for sale, two dogs, some chickens and a nice farmhouse. They’ve lit up a Christmas tree out front for tonight’s show and I pull up next to the prettiest sunset I’ve seen the whole trip. Bright reds and oranges splash across the clouds and I remember again why, to quote Blue Rodeo, I miss those Western skies.

Coaldale, I find out, is a bedroom community of Lethbridge. It’s in the same desert areas as Medicine Hat and it’s much warmer than Calgary or Cochrane, where it felt like I was much farther north. Coaldale is known for its Birds of Prey rescue centre – which explains their tagline “The Town that Gives a Hoot.” Coaldale also recently prides itself on delivering the latest Canadian Idol, giving Medicine Hat’s Kaylan Porter a run for his money.

Frank and Deb’s place is great for shows, with two level audience seating, most on the main floor, but some up on the balcony above watching me through the railing. The audience arrives and seats themselves. The audience includes a fair number of church choir singers, so the sing alongs sound lovely. Apparently we’re in the bible belt of Alberta and I worry a bit again about “My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish-Wiccan Wedding”, but it goes over fine – or at least, no one runs me out of town.

I have to constantly remember to sing up to the balcony above me, tilting my head every second line. I ask everyone’s advice on how to get out to Vancouver and everyone agrees I should fly. I’m now a bit freaked out about the 2-day drive from Moose Jaw to Vancouver (with a show on the 2nd day) – in the little Suzuki Swift with no snow-tires.

The most awkward part of the show is when the door in the front hall next to me opens suddenly and I end up making conversation with the new guests who have joined us, clearly taking off their coats and shoes, only to find out from the audience, who can see into the front hall, that no one is there and the door just blew open by itself. The crowd forgives this though and by night’s end gives me the best encore clapping an cheering yet. I’m never prepared for encores, so I give them a choice of songs and they pick both. Nice.

Afterwards, one of their guests, a police officer in Lethbridge tells me that he really likes that my songs are all about real things and real people – he gives me a Lethbridge police pin that he designed and invites me to come on a “ride-along” with him, hoping that I’d write a song about the experience… I can’t wait – very cool.

Once almost everyone has left we do another jam – pulling out more guitars, songsheets and wine. A lovely end to a lovely evening.

I leave as early as I can – after pancakes – and head out on Highway 1 to Medicine Hat – where my Dad lives – and where I’m going to play the first show I’ve every played for him. I’m a bit nervous, honestly, but the shows have been going well and my voice feels good.

I get to my Dad’s and we hang out a bit – I make some more CDs and play with his cats, Katey and Siley. We talk a lot about the shows – something we don’t normally do over the phone – it’s nice to give him the inside scoop on what I think during the shows.

Finally, I head out to Blair and June’s place, which is on the outskirts of Medicine Hat – it’s a beautiful place that Blair built himself. Although they’ve done a number of these shows and Blair was the first to get involved with them, tonight he’s stuck in Ottawa, so June’s fling solo.

We chat happily and I play with her border collie, Sadie, who seems to have an unlimited need to chase stuffed animals. She has a stuffed skunk that makes a noise similar to a Transformer when you bite it. She bites it a lot.

June’s mom and dad show up and then my dad shows up. It’s not like the show will really be any different, but I’m still nervous about playing in front of him – maybe it’s because this is one of the biggest reasons why I wanted to play this tour. Maybe it’s because I’ve been playing “My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish-Wiccan Wedding” and I have no idea what my dad’ll think of it.

Unlike the night before, the crowd doesn’t really know each other, which makes for a nice night of socializing – everyone meeting each other for the first time. My dad seems to have a good time and I introduce myself to everyone.

June introduces me saying that Blair was really sorry he couldn’t be here – they’d listened to my CD and were looking forward to me coming the most out of the lineup – which again is very cool, since I kind of think my old CD is, well, old.

The chairs are lined up about Sadie’s width away from me – she snakes herself through the audience during the sets getting petted. The audience is excellent and my voice feels better than ever. Occasionally I glance over to my dad and he’s laughing and singing along with all of them – and he laughs with everyone during My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish-Wiccan Wedding – I’m a happy singer/songwriter. Betty, my dad’s wife arrives a couple songs in – she got stuck at work. At intermission I check in with them and they’re having a good time.

I meet a nice couple from Holland, Piet and Ina – Piet tells me the story of Piet Hein, a famous German pirate who fought the Spanish in Cuba, stealing all of the Spanish armada’s gold and silver. Apparently there’s a Danish song devoted to him. Who knew I had a famous Spanish-fighting Cuban-german pirate relative? There’s even a hotel chain in Amsterdam named after him.

In the second set I rib the Medicine Hat-ers about their city’s tagline, “The Gas City” – I told them that Rocky Mountain House was “Where Adventure Begins” and they could at least do “Where Gas Adventures Begin.”

June sings along in the background, mouthing the words to the songs off my album. In the second set, Sadie gets hold of her stuffed skunk again and goes off on a skunk solo during a song.

Eventually the night ends and we say goodbye to everyone – my Dad tells me he really enjoyed it. Someone tells June’s parents that they have a very nice son-in-law… ummmm… sorry, Blair!

I head back to my Dad’s and stay up with him and Betty for awhile – my Dad had a great time and wants to go to more house concerts – very cool.

I head back into Calgary and try to find a bank – everything I make is in 5’s, 10’s, and 20’s, so I have a wad of cash that I get nervous about carrying around. Afterwards I head to Chris & Jo-Anne’s – nice folks who are doing their first house concert.

Their kids, Cam and Griffin are great boys but totally different. Cam is into sports and Griffin is the resident artist – playing music on all sort of instruments, making comics, and generally being creative (sound familiar?).

Tonight’s crowd is interesting for a couple reasons – almost all of them are skiers and also, an old friend, Denene, from Toronto is coming to the show. The skiers are all serious skiers (case in point: Chris once got Jo-Anne an avalanche oxygen mask for a birthday present – yes, a mask, just in case you get buried in an avalanche… you have to REALLY want to ski, if there’s a chance there’s an avalanche, and you STILL go skiing!!!).

It’s nice to catch up with Denene - she’s getting married – Congrats, D!! – but part of my job is to meet everyone and kind of welcome them, so it’s hard to talk too much, just to her.

The show is downstairs in the basement. Like in Rocky Mountain House, my bedroom is right behind the performance space, which rocks! The show goes great – Chris & Jo-Anne pull out the most people on the tour so far and they’re an excellent group, with a rowdy front row. On the side, Gryphon watches – I think he’ll be playing house concerts soon. Or making comics. Or both.

After the show, two of their friends arrive late and I promise them a couple tunes once everyone else has left. They’re good folks who clean up completely. We head back downstairs and I ask Chris & Jo-Anne for requests from the show – and to my surprise Chris chooses My Eyes Wide and Seventeen – two of my older tunes – which is pretty cool. One of the nice things about this tour is the fact that I’m playing 2 hour shows, which means I have to play some of my older songs, which I don’t normally play – but it’s sweet to have people hear these songs again for the first time – and respond to them. Especially the somewhat more serious tunes – since I’m sometime known for my goofy tunes like Jetpack or My Mother’s Lesbian Jewish Wiccan Wedding.

We play songs until I feel like I’m going to fall asleep playing – so I stop playing and go fall sleep.

I drive out of Calgary past stretches of beautiful snow covered trees. Although I know we’re south of Calgary, it feels like I’m heading into some northern logging town.

I don’t get to see a lot of some of the towns that I stop in out here – I usually arrive around dark and leave in the morning– so often I have to ask things like “What’s Cochrane known for?”

Apparently it’s known for hangliding. Who knew?

Unfortunately it’s too cold to hanglide (I totally would), but instead I get to hang out with Brian and Carolyn, who are totally sweet. Brian and I share a love of comics and after dinner, he shows me his excellent collection of Marvel Masterworks, and Calvin & Hobbes books. I space out a bit to early Captain America stories, but snap back in time to set up.

It’s a Wednesday and I’ve heard from some of the house concert hosts that school nights are harder to get people out, so when only 10 people show up, I’m not surprised. But I’m also not disappointed, because the crowd is great. Everyone is totally nice and they include a couple incredibly talented painters, who have been involved with an amazing mural project in town – basically the town creates a huge mural, but each painter creates their own little 2’ x 2’ painting. Pretty neat – check it out and click on some of the individual squares.

Plus, for a 10 person show, everyone is loud, singing and laughing along with the best of them. And afterwards, they’re very nice – one nice art therapist, says that my song, High School Geography and Another Time or Year make for great musical therapy.

It’s a beautiful night, but I’m tired and head to bed… and then read Calvin & Hobbes for several hours…

I spent the day in Starbucks - apparently if you buy a starbucks card in a tiny mitten, you get 2 hours of free internet everyday. Plus, they have awesome hot chocolate. A good deal in my books.

Finally, I head out of town - although this show is listed as Calgary, it's technically on the outskirts in a beautiful log cabin home - the dream home of Karen and Bill, who meet me and welcome me to their lovely home. They're Ontarians and theatre folk, so we're instantly related - Karen's a director and teaches high school theatre, while being totally involved with the Canadian improv scene. Bill's a technician who has built, run, flown, and teched every aspect of theatre shows. They moved out to Alberta a while back and, since they were building their dream home, decided to construct a full black box theatre in the basement. Seriously, who knew?! There's a booth, a grid, a green room, and theatre seating - it's pretty cool!

We eat dinner and I get introduced to their lovely cats - Gizmo, who likes to hug people and chew on buttons is my favourite.

Karen and Bill have been doing house concerts in the theatre for a while - I decide to continue with the acoustic route and forego the sound system, since the acoustics in the space are beautiful. People arrive and I meet some of them - this house concert is a bit more formal or professional than the others, possibly because of their theatre experience, not to mention their theatre! Everyone troops down to the basement, Karen gives an intro and I come out from backstage. With the stage lights on, I can't see the audience and it all feels a bit bizarre compared to the living rooms I've been playing in the past couple days. But the audience is lovely and even if I can't see them, I can hear them laughing and clapping along.

On my 2nd song, one of my strings breaks. I hate this. It generally throws off my whole show. I get rid of the string while telling a story - I can't change the string since all my gear is backstage, so I play the rest of the set on 5 strings which constantly go out of tune. I'm sure no one cares, but I feel a bit off balance.

The 2nd set though, once restrung, is excellent and intimate. The crowd asks me Muppet and touring questions and it feels like a great dialogue rather than a one-way show.

After everyone leaves, Karen, Bill and I sip wine outside on their deck with a fire blazing. We share theatre stories and they tell me that deer frequently come up to their house. I stare into the darkness hoping to see one, but none come. Eventually, wined out, I head to bed.

The next day, Karen and Bill leave me the keys and I hang out, using the internet, playing with Gizmo and eating delicious home made bread. Way better than Starbucks.

[where adventure begins... and where I get drunk on wine and play songs way too fast]

Contrary to popular belief - or at least MY belief - Rocky Mountain House is a city, not a house. Apparently it's the place where the Hudson's Bay Company started and people regularly revisit famous Canadian voyageur routes from here in giant canoes and sled dogs. It's motto is "where adventure begins" and I wish I could stay long enough to play. Travelling north, I pass buffaloes, lamas, and cows in golden fields glinting with snow - it's very pretty. I also pass a small town called Caroline - I roll the windows down and sing my song "Caroline" to them. No one seems particularly impressed, but I'm happy.

Sadly again, even though I have an address, I get lost - the house is brand new and my GPS doesn't think it exists. I drive through a game of ball hockey twice before my host, Cheri, comes to my rescue. She and her husband, Doug's place is beautiful - all wood and stone and set against a backdrop of trees and mountains. This is their first house concert and they've gone all out, borrowing a popcorn maker and stocking up on wine.

After another great home cooked meal (okay, I'll stop talking about them now - but Mom, I'm being very well fed), I take ANOTHER steam shower and, freshly cleaned, I set up as Cheri and Doug's friends arrive. It's always interesting to see where people come from for shows - this crowd is filled with Doug's Shell co-workers, Cheri's swimming coach, and teaching friends - all very sweet.

The show is a lot of fun. Doug puts a cowboy hat on my head for Caroline and a fight breaks out between Calgary and Edmonton football fans. Everyone sings along and heckles me happily. I sell a LOT of CDs. Again, I improv up a verse for Victoria:

Well they said that it was far out
They said 3 hours out of town
But they never told me how much fun I'd be having
At Rocky Mountain House

Afterwards, after everyone left, I play cover tunes with Doug, Cheri and a couple of their friends as we drink wine. I babble my way through one-week and end of the world as we know it, realizing that I haven't really drank much recently and am suddenly a super cheap date.

The next morning, after another steam shower (where have these things been all my life?), I eat breakfast with Cheri and she tells me that there's routinely moose, cougars, and deer outside their house. Luckily I don't see any cougars, but Rocky is definitely where adventure begins.